Client B was a 46-year-old woman with a teenage daughter from another marriage. She lost her partner of 6 years after he had a massive heart attack in her kitchen. He was resuscitated by paramedics but died in the ambulance on the way to hospital.
She explained that her partner was a big character whom everyone liked, they worked together although on different teams. She explained that they both had their own houses but he would very often stay over at her house. He had formed a lovely relationship with her daughter and was always buying them both gifts.
Client B went on to explain that she was struggling to come to terms with the fact that he was gone but also new information had come to light after he passed. She found out that he was in a lot of debt even though he was always buying expensive gifts and clothes. He had been texting and meeting other women. He was not divorced from his ex-wife and had also been in contact with her, even though he had always maintained that they had no contact what so ever.
Symptoms of sadness, anger, difficulty in falling asleep, helplessness and disbelief were the initial responses to his death.
Using person centred counselling I helped her gain a better understanding of the grieving process, and I was able to normalise the array of emotions she was experiencing.
It is suggested that we experience 5 emotional stages of grief these are understood to be denial, bargaining, anger, depression and acceptance/hope.
There is no right or wrong way to grieve as everybody is different in how they deal with loss. However, client B felt that she would benefit from being able to discuss and explore her feelings and emotions with someone who was impartial. She expressed how her emotions were tangled and confused because he had told so many lies.
Over a period of 12 sessions, we were able to explore her grief and her relationship with her partner. “Just being able to off load not only about my grief but also my anger and disappointment in my partner to someone non-judgemental is really helpful as I do not want other members of my family knowing about his lies and cheating”.
Client B stated that she has “learnt to live with and accept the loss” but knows she will never get over it.
